tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize