Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
