hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize