I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
