I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
