I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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