I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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