glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
