i think i have two assholes
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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