Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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