if i can run in heels then i can drive
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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