I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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