1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
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