think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
