he wants to bone in the snuggie
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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