I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
