There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
