I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
