You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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