she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
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