I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize