Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
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I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
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It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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