i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
