Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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