We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just want to make out with him forever
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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