That's intense
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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