I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
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She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
We had to coat check the pizza.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
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My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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