I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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