Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize