Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize