Fuck appropriateness.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
