But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
