He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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