The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I smell stomach acid.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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