Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
