I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
