He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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