we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize