Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
