Will you blow on my dice?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
