I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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