You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize