you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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