Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
