I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
