have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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