Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  check it out our google latitudes are spooning

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  (516): check it out our google latitudes are spooning http://tfl.nu/t63m
  Replies (5) Good night (946) Bad night (472)
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  (631): View more from New York

  guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis

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  (631): guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis http://tfl.nu/a1d7
  Replies (22) Good night (810) Bad night (3055)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.

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  (865): And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly. http://tfl.nu/a3gz
  Replies (21) Good night (5784) Bad night (749)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco

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  (734): it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco http://tfl.nu/syi8
  Replies (19) Good night (3177) Bad night (985)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.

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  (443): He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to. http://tfl.nu/5t0r
  Replies (22) Good night (4588) Bad night (2093)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.

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  (206): He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go. http://tfl.nu/rhri
  Replies (13) Good night (2089) Bad night (3569)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".

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  (859): The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis". http://tfl.nu/o2ql
  Replies (9) Good night (3129) Bad night (1009)
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  (650): View more from California

  Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.

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  (650): Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right. http://tfl.nu/x2bs
  Replies (3) Good night (2694) Bad night (815)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  no more duck duck goose at the bar

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  (484): no more duck duck goose at the bar http://tfl.nu/05y7
  Replies (6) Good night (2311) Bad night (796)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.

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  (509): walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her. http://tfl.nu/knz9
  Replies (9) Good night (5704) Bad night (639)
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  (925): View more from California

  We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car

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  (925): We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car http://tfl.nu/ofum
  Replies (9) Good night (1818) Bad night (575)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.

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  (573): It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children. http://tfl.nu/cjdr
  Replies (2) Good night (769) Bad night (331)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.

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  (513): Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for. http://tfl.nu/4mzo
  Replies (0) Good night (327) Bad night (179)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you

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  (204): You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you http://tfl.nu/fqb1
  Replies (0) Good night (364) Bad night (142)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises

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  (708): Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises http://tfl.nu/4oct
  Replies (1) Good night (525) Bad night (176)

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