I think scott just propositioned me for sex
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
