I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
