Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
