That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
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