D3 body, D1 cock
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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